“Somewhere in the Middle Lies the Truth”

 

“When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know.  But if you listen, you may learn something new.” Dalai Lama

 

These are divisive times for sure.  Whether you voted for Trump or Clinton you are probably looking at friends who voted the opposite and wondering how they can think the way they do.  I have been caught up with it this week myself, but then I remembered something very simple.  It is a principle I know all too well from growing up and moving through life in recovery.  That principle is, “there are two sides to every story, and somewhere in the middle lies the truth”.

It should no longer astound me that people can look at the same thing and see it very differently.  My brother and I grew up in the same family, in the same house with the same parents and had vastly different experiences.  I can state with assurance that my father was an alcoholic, my brother would argue (and has) that my father was not an alcoholic.  I would tell you without hesitation that my mother is mentally and has been since I was a child.  My brother would tell you that she has dementia that started only a few years ago.  It would appear that we are both right and we are both wrong and somewhere in the middle lies the truth.

I look at my children.  They have the same parents, lived until recently as a family unit and share mostly the same life experiences but they could not be more different.  They see the same incident and come away with different perspectives often.  Wren has her reality and truth and Dermot has his own reality and truth.  But here is the thing…  They have SHARED experiences and they STILL see things differently.  Now imagine if they had vastly DIFFERENT experiences and think how vastly different their realities could/would be?  That is what is being highlighted now I believe.

A close friend of mine posted a cartoon on his Facebook page the other day and I shared it on.  It shows two men facing each other and looking down at a number painted on the floor.  One says, “six”, the other man standing opposite looking at the same number says, “nine”.  They are both right and they are both wrong.  They are seeing the same number but they are looking at that number from different perspectives.

I guess my hope is that we recognize that we are looking at the same number (or country) but some are seeing “sixes” and some are seeing “nines”.  I am attempting, by listening, to make my way at least halfway around the issue to see the other number so I can understand the perspective.  In understanding I think we can find a way to work together and not against each other.

For the record, I agree with peaceful protests but I abhor violence.  I am a fan of debate, as long as it is civil.  I know where I stand on humanitarianism, refugees, immigrants, race, gender and orientation, not I want to understand where others stand on those same issues so we can move forward.  I will continue to post the things I believe in and I will continue to listen to those who see a “six” when I see a “nine’.  Because in the end, “there are two sides to every story and somewhere in the middle lies the truth”.